The New York Adventure

I never wrote about our trip to NY. Well it was a whirlwind and once we got back and started to recover we had to face Elliott’s ill health. Since then there’s been a myriad of things to write about, but really it does deserve some attention.

We were fortunate in that Ruth, Piccolo’s mom, offered to drive us for our redeye flight out of SFO on Sunday night. Unfortunately much to TGF’s dismay and annoyance this was not a direct flight so there was a stopover at the Minneapolis-St. Paul airport. Predawn at an airport is a bit surreal. The lack of sleep (neither of us dozed well on the first leg) and her “inner gay man” came out in full force dissing people’s clothing right and left. If I wasn’t so grumpy I might have found the insightful if highly biting commentary amusing. All went well with the rest of the trip including renting the car.

I had never driven to or from Newark Airport but TGF was an excellent copilot though I relaxed greatly once we were in Westchester County and was breathing easier once we were on Route 9. TGF however was getting, well, a tad panicky. She and Sunny met, briefly during our last trip east. It was badly planned as we had we had flown in the evening before (the details posted here), I wasn’t able to get caffeine into TGF before the meet up. The normally chatty, witty, and intelligent Southern Babe I know was nowhere in evidence for fully the first 30 minutes. Thus her anxiety.

We arrived to joyous welcomes and hugs. Sunny proceeded to give the house tour and Karen was her witty self and doled out an appropriate number of compliments and leading questions. Whew. Later we went out to dinner at Umami with Sunny’s neighbor Barbara with her lovely but shy daughter Emma. The duck quesadilla appetizer was lovely as was grilled portabella and mozzarella. I had the pad thai – which was quite good. TGF had the truffled macaroni and cheese, which was magnificent!

Tuesday we did a small shopping expedition in order to pick up some make-up for TGF, because well she simply could not go to Broadway without the appropriate outfit (which we took care of earlier) and looking wonderful. The three of us headed to Bloomingdales in White Plains in such of Clinique – the only make up that can touch her delicate skin. I picked out a great lip colour, Pink Toffee for her. I picked up some Stila, lipstick (Piaf) mand eyeliner (Amethyst). With the exception of our first meeting, this might the only other time I have seen her with make-up on. Sunny thought she looked hot and compared her to Jeri Ryan. How much more of a compliment could she give her!

Lindsay, Sunny’s husband, was supposed to go with us to Broadway that night but his work compelled him and left him with deadlines that suddenly needed his attention. Luckily I suggested that we call Deborah to join us and she was able to make it. TGF and Deborah really hit it off at camp so this was a great bonus. TGF and I were starving so we all went for a really quick bite at Juniors which had just opened about 3 doors up from the theatre. Finally it was time to go to the performance of A Chorus Line. There was something incredibly thrilling about sitting so close watching my cousin, Jeff Schecter, on stage. It turned out that he has the first solo performance where he sings “I Can Do That”. There were a lot of great performers in this company: Yuka Takara is adorable, even more so in her own make up and clothing (yes we waited by the stage door after the show); Jason Tam gave a very moving performance (though in truth I found the writing itself a bit disjointed and lacking); Michael Paternostro, who is Jeff’s best friend was wonderful. Natalie Cortez has a great voice, emotions just pour forth. A significant amount of the show revolves around the character, Cassie, but I was far from impressed by Charlotte D’Ambroise’s performance. But Jessica Lee Goldyn gave an awesome performance of “Dance 10" (aka Tits and Ass). Oh and Deidre Goodwin - just Fabulous! Love her!

As I mentioned we waited by the stage door and gave kudos to a number of the actors while we waited for Jeff. Finally he came out. It was marvelous to see him, I think the last time I saw him was at our grandmother’s funeral over five years ago. Later TGF noted that his face absolutely lit up when he saw I was there – which is kind of how it felt. We don’t have a lot of shared history but a great amount of mutual affection. The director came out and complimented him on his number. It turns his number had been limited in dance moves because he severely twisted his ankle before they opened in San Francisco a month earlier. He had just been given the new choreography that afternoon – we would have never guessed! We all retreated back to Juniors so we could catch up a bit. By the way if any of my dear readers are interested in backing an independent comedy written by my cuz, contact me! I haven’t read it, cannot vouch for but he’s family, so I have to ask. After he left we wandered a few blocks out of our way (which my feet objected to though they looked fabulous in Aerosole shoes TGF bought me a year ago and hadn’t a chance to wear. I mean these shoes are killer!) to see the huge billboard (his is the third butt from the right) which has my cousin’s ass about three tall, at least.

The next day (Wednesday) we packed up and drove into the city proper, as in the five boroughs. I realize non-New Yorkers think “the city” only equals Manhattan but in fact “the city” is made up of all five boroughs. We drove through parts of the Bronx, Queens and finally our destination – Brooklyn. Even with a delayed start and some traffic snags we were only about 10 minutes late for meeting Jerry, my father, and Maddy, his girlfriend. We had a lovely lunch at an Italian place on Smith Street, which has in recent years become restaurant row – very different from when I lived there, many moons ago. Though TGF used codes so to give us an out (something we had discussed before) I decided that we should spend a bit longer with Jerry, especially since he really wanted to show me an apartment he is hoping to move into.

First we did stop briefly at the brownstone on Strong Place that is the closet thing I have to a family homestead. We didn't get to go inside but at least TGF now has a visual when I refer to the house.

The building Jerry is interested in relocating to is in the Red Hook neighborhood of Brooklyn, right on the water.

It is right by this Waterfront Museum.

Let me tell you the place he planning to move to is a fabulous remodel of a nineteenth century brick factory building (his building is mentioned here, it's connected to the Fairway Market). TGF demanded that I take all sort of photos outside to capture the views and inside.

This is one of the views from the roof. Even I would consider such a place, and there is just about nothing that would convince me to move back to NYC, as much as I love it.

Once we had done the rounds and ohh’ed and ahh’ed over the place we took off to Greg and Janet’s. Once we arrived in their place we both took our first really deep breath since we arrived and were probably more relaxed than we had been since before we left the west coast. After lolling about for a bit, we headed to Bogota – a great restaurant about two blocks from their place. Really good food, excellent margaritas, fabulous company. So nice. Essentially we came back to the apartment and one by one we drifted off to sleep. After a light breakfast of New York bagels and some good coffee we took off back to Newark.

It seems that we have made peace with the transportation gods since everything went smoothly. We are grateful for that. It was a successful visit regarding TGF meeting the family. Lindsay officially welcomed her. Jerry was assured of his adoration of her. Maddy seemed to approve as well. And Sunny, well I am sure she was charmed though TGF is feeling shaky. Do they adore each other madly? No. But I do think that Sunny is feeling good about things and that’s a very good thing.

Not so finished

Well I finally decided to look at Niya's cat bed without the support of tupperware and towels to form it. Sigh. The sides flop sadly, so I suspect another go in the washer is in order. I'm thinking at least a 6 minute cycle this time, since I think I did 6 and then 2 last time. It is still quite large so I am not too concerned about that part. I am sad that it did not stiffen as I had hoped. Here's to hot water and friction.

On a happier note, I did switch needles on the surprise project and it is flying! I actually now have something that would be to big for B*rbie. The downside is it is so frigging boring. All knit stitch and I just am doing it until it's the right size, which even with better needles is going to be awhile. Soon I will pick up T'Mane's outfit again, especially since I finally ordered more yarn so I can make the pants. Jeez, it's good things she's a peanut, it should still fit. My new deadline is Thanksgiving.

The lure of the shawl sirens has hit me which leaves me pondering if the Dale of Norway Svale in Mist (9 skeins) that I have would work for either Swallowtail or Shetland Triangle from Wrap Style. Conveniently I own the copy of Interweave that has Swallowtail, and my best bud Jennie, owns the book Wrap Style. Easy enough to see if the yardage is there in my stash. This all leaves 3 skeins in lavender to use somewhere as well. Any thoughts?

Finding a rhythm

Apparently the dark hours before dawn are very productive for me. On Friday I woke up at 5:00a.m. thanks to the kittens and could not go back to sleep. That is when I finished the edit of the research paper, wrote in my online classes a bit, emailed a different professor (who has not written back yet!) and so forth. Friday night is when I finished the cat bed and the mittens. Saturday I did not wake unusually early but evidently propelled by the productivity of the day before had me posting away on my online classes. Then nothing. No seriously.

Fast forward to this morning. Again the kittens decided playing on sleeping mama heads was a good idea. Again I could not fall back to sleep because I started obsessing on school work - a common thread over here at The Cedar Street Zoo. So at just after 4:00a.m. I quietly found warm clothes, grabbed my glasses, headed to the laundry room to throw a load in, and settled on the couch with Lotus (my laptop) and my Crisis Intervention book. Read chapter eight, reviewed the assignment based on the chart in chapter six on Erikson's stages of development.

"Using Kanel's chart from page 93, map your own life using Erikson's stages but put in a "Possible Problematic Social Role Change" from your own personal life history. From your current vantage point suggest the Intervention(s) you would recommend now. Use only one "Possible" for each stage. "

There is something especially surreal about doing this type of assignment before daybreak. I realize that one in a graduate program in psychology gets to examine their life and all the minutiae of crazy that has happened but trying to choose the one problematic crisis? How is it possible to determine which messed up episode captures the representation of development for each life stage? Saana and Atticus served as silent supporters of my careful consideration of what details about myself I was willing to reveal and still truly fulfill the assignment. It was very interesting writing the interventions as I have wondered about this sort of thing, without the language and background, in earlier musings. Also as this part of the course is focused on crisis and not particularly doing therapy, it was really challenging because deep therapeutic work was what was needed frequently in the episodes I choose.

Sometimes doing this work reminds me of when I did the certificate program in Maternal and Child Health at Boston University's School of Public Health. You read about all about the multitude of things that can go wrong and scare yourself. During that one year program I did about, hm, 6 births? It was hard as hell not to worry, to pick over symptoms, to pray furiously to deities you're not even sure you believe in. When I read about the dysfunctions of families, there are times I feel like my life is being used without permission in vignettes. Looking at couple dynamics I feel like I am scoring my relationship against the examples in the texts and trying to justify where we are not perfect. No couple is perfect, and no one really knows what happens when no one is there to listen in. In theory we all know this, but still we posit the dynamics we only have hints at. There are times I feel like I am a living, breathing example of a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. Who am I to provide therapy? I realize I have some skills, and will gain more before, before what exactly? In truth I have been already providing therapy but somehow it doesn't feel real right now. When my next client is assigned, will it start feeling real again? Probably and it will leave me with a fear that leaves me hollow on the days when I feel it is hopeless and I am ineffective. Those days will be countered by the moments of deep connection with a client. It's then that regular math doesn't work. Minutes will quell days of dread. It's magic formula.

Remind me of that will you?

Finished, almost finished, trying to finish, and hopefully finished

After great delay and putting aside I have finished Adrienne's gift of a hat and mittens. These mitts are my first try at the critters, which took a number of attempts to truly finish. First there was trying this pattern, which while quick, just looked formless and too short. So searched and decided on this pattern. There was simply no comparison - more elegant shaping, better length and fit, tighter stitch thus the first mitt got frogged unmercifully. Inspired by the speed with which even the second mitt was done I started gleefully on the second but when done it was seriously smaller. Sigh.

Frogging and more yarn usage occurred. Wonderful you say, well I would have too except now the second mitt's thumb was too small. Finally last night I snipped and frogged, but done! The hat was my own creation, I added a barely noticeable eyelet pattern to keep from getting bored while knitting. Also started that twice as I did not account for the yarn girth, frogged, reduced my cast on by 20 stitches less and now I love it. Given that it is a fantastic colour I am sure Adrienne will enjoy it.
Yarn: Lion Brand Homespun, colour grape.
Hat: circular size 9
Mittens: size 6, Crystal Place, size 7 Susan Bates Quick Silver (borrowed from Jennie)

Niya's cat bed has finally been casted off, thrown in the washer for felting - one 6 minute cycle,one 2 minute cycle, hot wash, cold rinse. I love love this yarn for bulky projects and of course it's been discontinued. The pattern is simple but I wasn't sure about adding the eyelash.

I searched my stash and found this great colour, no label so I have no idea of it's origins. I finished it last night which included trying very haphazardly to circle a tupperware thingy with towels to reach something like the circumference I want. It is currently drying and I am hoping getting a little stiff.

Given it's my first felting attempt I won't worry too much about how sturdy the sides will be long term. Yarn: Debbie Bliss - Soho (disc) colour 37505 I think.
Some unknown but fantastic eyelash yarn.
Needles: Size 9 dpn, Clover I think? and Size 11 Clover circulars.


Next up is the secret project which is taking a long time for a few reasons. I don't love the Daisy circulars (size 13) for the ladder/railroad yarn at all! The points are way too dull for the material. Then all the yarn started coming off the cardboard it's packaged on. Don't let this happen to you.


This is how it looks after spending 4+ hours detangling! I am thinking of changing over to my Clover circulars (size 15). Since there isn't much done yet and gauge is not critical I think it might be okay. If it makes the project go faster then it's worth the shift in scale.



As to the hopefully finished, I sent off my revised research proposal paper to my professor this morning. Now mind you this is not research I will actually conduct, it was merely practice for writing such a thing. Since I do not plan on doing research it is a tad annoying but on the other hand it give me greater insight on how much work it takes to justify research that does happen. It also gives me pause for the future of this nation given how much is researched that is obvious. Like this tidbit:

Given the high incidence of childhood sleep problem and diagnosed postnatal depression, it is likely significant numbers of mothers being diagnosed as having postnatal depression are suffering the effects of chronic sleep deprivation.

Armstrong, K.L., Van Haeringern, A.R. (1998) Sleep deprivation or postnatal depression in later infancy: Separating the chicken from the egg. Journal of Paediatric Child Health, Volume 34 (3) pp??.

Brilliant! Brilliant I tell you, I would have never put postpartum depression and sleep deprivation together. Of course my proposal was so much more brilliant even than that. It had something to do with investigating if feelings of disempowerment during the birthing process lead to a crumbled self confidence which in turn would impact the marital dyad. Of course my greater intent would be to process data that would help support (eventually, after about 12 more studies) Stanton's* premise, which I concur with, that what we label postpartum depression is actually a realistic response to the pressures women feel when they become mothers in our society which makes it nearly impossible to be held in high esteem when one is a mother without turning around and smacking you down because that's all you do or smacking you for daring to have a life and possibly a career in addition to being a mother. This all results in a struggle for identity that leaves most women exhausted and overwhelmed and feeling like a failure.

Oh dear it appears I have found myself on a soapbox, how did I get here? Pardon me, as I step down.

I am off to accomplish more things. Ta ta!


*References

Stanton, A., Lobel, M., Sears, S., & DeLuca R. (2002) Psychosocial aspects of selected issues in women'’s reproductive health: Current status and future directions. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. Volume 70(3), 751–770

The Girl Friend agrees.

Emphatically so.

What Your Underwear Says About You

When you're bad, you're very bad. And when you're good, you're still trouble! You're sexy, in that pinup girl, tease sort of way.

The Underwear Oracle

If I am remembering correctly this

This matches my Myers-Briggs score from eons ago. Even if it didn't, the "score" makes sense to me.

Your Personality Cluster is Introverted Feeling

You are: Tolerant, flexible, and open to new ideas. A stickler for integrity and authenticity. Passionate about causes, beliefs, or politics. Likely to have many "best friends" from many walks of life

What's Your Personality Cluster?

Distractions Needed

Thanks be to Juno for this post which has me thinking about knitting rather than the ill cat lying next to me. Now I want to get my hands on the Spring 2004 Interweave because I found still more patterns to pine over.


I am not sure I have "True Yarn" yet, though I am loving the (of course) discontinued Debbie Bliss Soho (colour 9). I am just about finished Niya's cat bed using it, and should have just a few yards less than 5 balls left. If I like how the felting works I'm thinking about making a laptop cover for my Lotus Baby. Yes, I named the new laptop Lotus, stop groaning!


While Juno pined for the Salt Peanuts, I am interested at least in Polka Purl Dots, though I really need to see a better photo. Oh found one! Nice. Swell Sweater seems like something to hang out in but could be dresser when the occasion called for it. Caramel Cap-Sleeve Top, maybe, again need to see more. Oh, maybe NOT on the Caramel! Ditto Side to Side Ribbon Pullover. Of course, that would require a lot of ribbon yarn, which well, isn't a "True Love" type of yarn for me. Hm, found a photo, perhaps not. Well thanks to surfing for the above photos I found this, which is tempting.

Distraction good.

Oh! My lovely friend Ruth, Piccolo's mom, gave me a birthday gift the other day. Before giving it to me she said, "This is only for you. You'll understand when you open it." FOUR lovely hanks of Misti Alpaca Chunky in Marina Melange. This stuff is so soft. I am thinking I might be able to make a "set" of a scarf, hat and fingerless gloves. Maybe there would be enough yarn. Maybe this Reversible Cable scarf. Or something simple like this. I'm wondering if these would work. I long to be at Savannah Chick's level, so making something of hers would be moving in that direction. Or, since I'm making her cat bed design, maybe these. I love these but not for this yarn. Oh! But that pattern would be lovely, I think, for the Lorna's Lion & Lamb hank that Jennie (it's a different Jennie link than the last post because that girl is so busy she has TWO blogs!) gifted me with some time ago. But would I wear them enough, I mean this yarn is GORGEOUS!

Again I say, Distraction Good.

It's not a good sign

When the vet tech looks briefly at your cat's test results, then ushers you to an exam room. I was expecting this, I really was but how prepared can one really be when a cat that holds your heart in his tiny paw is fatally ill.

My beloved Elliott has the effusive form of Feline Infectious Peritonitis (FIP). From the moment he came to our home as a foster, May 29th 2005 this little ragamuffin stole my heart. Elliott was a little sick as young one, briefly very ill and we needed to give him subcutaneous injections of fluids, he often ran hot appearing to have a fever. As an adolescent cat he was gangly, reminiscent of a young Henry Fonda.







He grew into a long and elegant cat, I adored every phase. Elliott is the loner of the group, only bonding with Orion who was in his foursome (TGF brought home Elliott {nee Achilles}, Orion, Caliopee, and Atticus {nee Lycus} while I was attending a birth.).

Though it was my heart that was smitten he would have nothing to do with me. He regularly begs to sit on TGF's chest while she sits on the couch surfing the web, or stands on her chest when she is in bed. Of course I suppose it's only fair as Atticus stole her heart and soul but he pines for me when I go out of town.

(I just lost everything I wrote after this, so I will try to recreate it. Once was friggin hard enough!)

Tonight after telling TGF (which sucked, a LOT) I gathered up the skinny, pot-bellied cat my boy has become and we sat together while I surfed, thought, and whispered sweet things in his ear. He sat with me for an hour which is a clear sign that he is not well.

Over dinner, I glimpsed at Elliott and his belly looked smaller. I swear it did, so I thought, "Maybe he will be that one in a million that spontaneously goes into remission and will live for years more." Wishful thinking. Wishing very hard.

Now we are left with deciding how much is enough. It is a fine line between not allowing him to suffer and how much are we sparing ourselves. I have never had to do this with a member of my family. I know I'’ve been lucky. All my cats have done off to die. My family dog was put down after I left home and without my prior knowledge. I think I would before to have a vet come to our home to put my boy love down. Afterwards, I'm not sure. Jennie was a sweetheart and sent me the link to the place she used. They sprinkled the ashes at a pet garden. I don't know if the site wasn'’t clear or I just could not feel it, but I could not see using them. Maybe it's too soon to think clearly about this. I never understood keeping a box of ashes, but I am beginning to see the draw. The desire to hold on can be so intense.

Toy Story - The Adult Version

Keep them coming folks!

Official Announcement: Dharma will be accepting toy stories until January 1st 2007 for use in an article which will be published, er, hopefully somewhere but certainly if nowhere else here!

I've got a couple, Melissa B and Wen have sent me the bones of two more. Com'on folks! I see great things here.

Melissa - well our toy get "chewed" and generally used by the dog and cats!
Wen - I am hoping you eventually got a new version to give to T. I love the idea that the SW employee wouldn't know what to do with it, however I used to correspond with a SW employee that I'm pretty sure would think it was her lucky day to find it.

200 and nothing to say

This will be my 200th post! I cannot believe it, not just because of the sheer number but because I really and truly have nothing funny, poignant, or some other great adjective to say. Sure I could, and ought to, report on our trip to NY, and I have been stewing some ideas for posts in my brain but none seem done, or more precisely I am too cranky to work on them.

Random bits from my universe:

- Marcel still isn't have the best bowel movements so a sample was ceremoniously scrapped from the living room floor behind the television where he insists of doing his bidness. He has been nicknamed Mr. Prissy Pants as I think part of using my living room floor as his litter box is because he is VERY fussy about the state of his litter box and won't use it if it does not meet his standards.

- Elliott is at the vet's office for blood tests and such, after being taken in for an 8:30am appointment. Now you have to know that 8:30am is the devil's time for TGF as she hates being up and functioning early so I am totally stumped as to why she agreed to that time yesterday when she called. The vet was not encouraging in his assessment of Elliott's health, basically everything that could be causing his belly to swell is pretty serious and potentially we may have some hard choices to make. I am holding out hope that rumors of ill health have been greatly exaggerated.

- Wyatt is being a royal pain. I do think that he is acting out in part because we were away again so soon, though he had an housesitter/pet amuser extraordinaire, Brooklynne, who spoiled him with two walks a day. In addition he needs a dose of flea medication so in the meantime he is snuffylying something horrid with such fervor that he wakes us up during the night. The coup de grace was waking up this morning to find he had spent part of those wee hours destroying a new, er, toy* TGF had bought for me (really if you think about it, for us ;-)) for my birthday yesterday. Yes, we did get to use it last night but now it has become a one trick pony as it is irrevocably destroyed. The kittens keep finding bits of carcass that was a tool of joy and playing with it. Glad someone can still get enjoyment out of it.

- My professor finally sent my paper back with revisions. I like how he says, "You have some work to do, but not a lot". Sure not a lot. Just have to dump two citations and find new ones that say the same thing but strictly in the field of psychology. Sheesh, psychology? I mean for cripes sakes just because I am pursuing a degree in psychology the references have to be from the field? Whoever heard of such a thing? I ask you. No really, I'm asking.

- Yesterday we had a lovely breakfast at La Note, which serves my all time favorite breakfast (Cote Nord), which in my opinion is a great way to start one's birthday. I haven't been in forever, and TGF had never been there. It did not disappoint. From there we wondered into Pendragon Books next door, but surprisingly not much inspired us, though I did pick up the October issue of Cook's Illustrated my all time favorite cooking magazine and it should be yours. I thought it would be fun to check out Crossroads Trading across the street. The selection there is quite fun and most things are quite reasonably priced. Well I thought so until I went to check out and was surprised to hear the total. However I thought a moment and realized that it averaged just under $10 for each item (which doesn't match the time where things average out to $4 a piece, but still decent), including a very fun pair of heels, some, er, play clothing much of which, because I am nothing if not frugal, I can wear as part of my regular wardrobe, which I hope to make TGF crazy with since it will have other connotations. Evil? According to recent testing I am not all that evil, right?

I suspect it really is time for me to start to work, like on the above mentioned paper from hell. Still need to find a cassette player (Jennie, it needs to play regular sized cassette, not mini. But thanks!), and someone to interview for the other class. Once all this stuff is done and evaluated I will have finished two classes that have been hanging over my head for almost 2 years and I can move on to the next 3 classes I hope to finish up while taking, um, 3 classes this semester, hopefully 4 if I can enroll in one class as a mentored class rather than online. Oh yeah, and I really need to go to the TBS office this week, do my paperwork to account for my practicum hours. Not that TBS has finished getting the paperwork over to my school so Saybrook can approve the site or anything. Nope nothing like that! I am trying to gear up to taking another client as I need to get cracking on hours for this semester. The raging butterflies hit my belly every time I think about taking a new client but it must be done. Wish me luck!


* You didn't really think I'd link you to the actual toy, did you? Where would the fun be in that. This way your imagination can go wild, as we did last night.

Hanging by a thread

It galls me no end to see the awful state of the sale racks at Old N*avy. Really it does. First, it is an abomination of clothing. How insulting for those articles of cotton, cotton/linen/spandex, cotton/polyester to be subjected to in the name of some careless soul looking for a deal in her size. How hard is it, I ask you, to put things back where you found them, to scoop a fallen shoulder back up to the supportive arm of a hanger? Is your time more precious than that flimsy, cotton sleeveless peasant blouse in off white? I think not.

Next up is where are all the sale people who wander aimlessly and cannot be bothered to help you. Perhaps they could better serve you, and spill forth less contempt when you ask for a size 14 if they actually straightened those damn racks.

However the most amazing thing is the lack of respect by the customers of the clothing, of the staff, of the luxury of shopping at all. Now I realize I am one of those shoppers but in my defense I will explain how I came to find myself at the Old N*vy in the Bay Shops of Emeryville. Compliments of a friend (the amazing Lisa G who is blogless) TGF has developed an addiction to slickd*als.net. While browsing the site, as she is wont to do for hours at a time of late, she found that the N*vy was having an additional 50% off their clearance merchandise. Well, even nickel scrapping but fashion conscious consumers such as ourselves could not blithely ignore such potential deals. No it was not possible for us to deny the call from the sirens of sales.

Quickly moving past the incoming fall clothing (mostly browns and grays, what is that about anyway?) but not so quickly as to miss any outstanding items of clothing to drape upon ourselves we moved swiftly to the sale section. And that my dear readers where I found myself shocked, just shocked at the state of those racks, it was horrendous. I did find some cute little things in the sales racks, though I tried on many more things than I bought. Next up, as we were on a bit of a mission as well since we were going to be going to Broadway to see A Chorus Line the third cute butt from right is my cousin!) which while still officially in previews is still going to the theatre nonetheless and TGF was looking for appropriate garb. (She did find a pair of pants at the N*vy which looked fantabulous in the rear, but she was looking for something to wear on top.)

We trudged on through some other stores, finally settling at AnnTaylor’s Loft. Now this is a distinctly more upscale environment that where we were but again the sale racks where a sight to behold, albeit not as atrocious. While dismayed at the state of affair at the N*vy I wasn’t surprised and have in fact noticed this before, but I was slightly appalled at ATL given the nature of the store. Items seemed a bit tumbled together without a lot of thought or care being given to have the same pair of pants all in one area. Very frustrating. Despite all of this I did find some delicious pants at 50% off. In black of course.

Sunny would be pleased

You Should Be A Poet

You craft words well, in creative and unexpected ways. And you have a great talent for evoking beautiful imagery... Or describing the most intense heartbreak ever. You're already naturally a poet, even if you've never written a poem.

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

I'm less evil than Louisana Swamp Rat?

You Are 38% Evil

A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well. In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.

How Evil Are You?

I'm not sure how that could be? LSR seems to me to be one of the best people I know, and surely I am more evil than her.

A Pictorial Entry

Finally, after way too long The Girl Friend and I went to a farmers' market, specifically the Jack London version, on Sunday, where she finally fulfilled her longing (and mine) for fried green tomatoes. Once home I went to place them in a bowl and on the buffet was a vintage fiestaware bowl - the same colour. It begged for a photograph. I actually took about a dozen, which I have edited down to about four. Be grateful I am only posting one.

The twins (as opposed to the triplets -who are not actually related - Gemma, Atticus, & Elliott) have grown so much.

Marcel starts to purr if you just look at him. He is getting healthy, he still had the runs when we got home and a second run on meds seems to have cleared it up, finally. Marcel is playful and lately Gemma has taken a liking to him exhibited by grooming behaviors. Really who could resist a face like that, I ask you?



Saana is a fiesty and affectionate little spitfire. When told no, she has a habit of looking you in the face, lifting a little paw and patting your mouth. Okay, actually she only does this to TGF. She like to cuddle up to all the cats, so far Gemma is refusing, Elliott allows her to lean into him.





I haven't posted too many photos of Elliott because, well, he's usually missing in action. Since we came home he has been hanging out a lot more, which is really nice. I love the sunlight on his fur in this one.




Wyatt and his best friend, Piccolo have resumed their activities playing in the fields and water ways of the two parks we take them to daily. So I will leave you a photo of them having fun.

Putting one foot in front of the other

That is how I am proceeding with school. Actually there has been progress. No really.

I turned in a lousy (IMNSHO) draft of the last paper for the research course (I will not say how long this has been lingering) just the other day. Again, no really. I tried a new approach and wrote to some colleagues who had actually finished this course to ask their opinion on my paper. "You are overwriting this thing" was the common reply. No really? Hm, never would have suspected that, now would you? With any luck I will only have to rewrite the blessed thing 3 more times to finish the course.

Yet another long lingering class will be finished soon as well. Yesterday I wrote to the professor, who no doubt does not remember me at all because it's been so long, suggesting that I had just these three assignments still due. I did imply that perhaps there were others. No, really! He seemed fine with my assessment. I have already half written one of them.

Once those are done, I will write the last paper for Developmental Psychology. Thanks to my dear sweet buddy Scott (yes, like most "mysp@ce" pages it's painful to read, go to his blog entries. Yes he's odd but that's why I love him so bad) have a lead for a primary source to read and quote liberally from. He and I have struck a deal to cajole, nuture, and harp on each other to get the hell out of Saybrook.
This is what he wrote me:

Proposal: You and I work together to keep ourselves engaged, productive, focused.

Because: More than anyone else, it seems that you and I will be humans in the way that an MFT program could only hope to evolve us with or without an education. We are poster children for humanistic/transpersonal ways of being present.

However: this awareness and presence doesn't keep us connected to the relative mindless drudgery of some of the classes.

(I think my hit the fan moment was when I realized that all the love and effort I was putting into the work wasn't going to budge the world. Not budge it. I can have a bigger impact in the Walmart check out line.)

How can one refuse or ignore such an offer. I do think knowing he is in this with me has helped me move a bit through the sludge of this work. I am not sure if he will graduate in January or June but even if it is January, I know I can count on his support through the spring semester to get me out the other side.

In speaking with Sunny today, she assured me that she could have been done with her Ph.D (remember I am only doing a Masters with no thesis, only a project or an oral exam) "so much sooner, if I hadn't had dissertation block". Yeah, I'm so sure. Remember folks she got pregnant with me during her undergrad work, had a second pregnancy that resulted in a neonatal death but still graduated phi beta kappa, went on to finish a masters and doctoral degree before I was 9 (not sure of the exact timing but I'm sure I was no older than 9 at the most). 9 frigging years old. Block my ass. However, she was incredibly supportive, told me how lucky I was to have a supportive partner who understood what I was doing, that people loved me, how great (not that she really knows but she's a mom) I did with my client, etc. etc. Oh, and she got a post-doc Woodrow Wilson Fellowship or something like that - she got to go the England for like six weeks one summer. Yeah, no pressure. Oh, yes, nothing like a role model for academic excellence you can never achieve.

Where was I? Oh yes, so I have this killer, as in kill me now, plan, to finish two years of work in one. Okay maybe a little less than that since within three weeks or so I should have four completed classes. Yes four because I actually received credit for a class in the semester I took it! No really. Okay so three semesters of coursework in two. So totally doable, right? Work with me people, lie if you have to.

Okay, need to finish the "Appreciative Inquiry" paper tonight! Then I need to borrow a cassette player (Jennie, do you have one?) to work on the second. After that I need to interview someone from a different cultural background to really try to inhabit their experience, their point of view. I really need to think about who to interview. Even in casually pondering this right now, I feel as though I mostly surround myself with folks who are like me, but that's not really true. I suppose it is true in some ways, so it's easy to make a list of who not to interview. Ruth is no for sure. Hm, maybe Roger the Neighbor? Maybe my former client's mother? Okay, that's a task for another day, clearly. First things first finish the damn Inquiry Paper.

The Girl Friend (TGF) would SO not agree

You Are 36% Control Freak

You have achieved the perfect balance of control and letting go. You tend to roll with whatever life brings, but you never get complacent.

Are You A Control Freak?

Yeah, it's true

You Communicate With Your Body

This isn't as bad as it sounds, it just means that you're a "touchy-feely" person. You need a lot of affection in your life. And for you, this means both giving and receiving little touches. Warm hearted, you bond with people easily. In fact, you often feel a little sad when you're not in the company of others. A little moody, you tend to be controlled by your emotions. But a bit hug always comforts you!

How Do You Communicate?

The Web that Has Many Weavers * (and Knitter and Spinners)

Yes, that WEBS. On the Monday that we were driving up to Maine, we stopped there. Briefly. How can one possibly be brief there? To say I was overwhelmed, is, well, an understatement. My head swirled as I went up and down aisles and criss-crossed the store. Oh my! I realized that there was no way I could make anything resembling a decision in the 15-20 minutes I had. Before leaving I stopped at the counter to ask about using the restroom. Well the restroom is through these doors marked "Warehouse". OMG! On the way I out, I asked as casually as possible if the "warehouse" was open to customers. I think I needed to grab at the counter to keep standing when the woman said yes. In summary, I walked away empty handed but determined to spend more time when I returned to Northampton after camp.

After the debacle that was returning the car in Portland, we then had another travel farce trying to find the HelMart in Auburn, which we had been to the year before. Driving up and down that damn Hotel Road, including through Auburn into Lewiston (FFS!), we headed back to the camp, stopping at a dinky Chinese restaurant. This proved most successful because it was now roughly 2pm and all we had consumed was coffee through this misadventure and because the hostess gave us more excellent directions to the place we sought. However since I hadn't bought any yarn the day before and I was thoroughly fried I searched out cheap yarn. Hey, it's better for my heart and hips that candy! I left HelMart with L*on's Brand Homespun in Grape & Colonial (a very delicious blue), Bernat Boa in Emu colourway, and Bernat Eye Lash in Glam colourway. I don't usually buy "novelty" yarn but they were really cheap and rather fun for what they were. I have no idea what I will do with them. Already the Grape has made hat and I am working on my first mittens - this set will get shipped to Adrienne, who adores purple unreasonably so, and who puts me (and now TGF) up every summer on the bookend times of camp.

Finally the day before "The Incredible True Adventures of Two Women Trying to Get Home" I returned to Webs. A primary mission was to spend Jennie's $20 on some yarn, ideally yarn that she didn't get to see in real life often. This meant no Cascade, Plymouth, Lorna's Laces, Rowans, Berroco, Debbie Bliss, Elsebeth Lavold, Jo Sharp, Karabella (isn't the top on the opening page beautiful?) and Southwest Trading Company, to name but a few of the fairly easy access yarns in our area. Plus I wanted to get her enough that she could actually make something with it. After much debate, touching, and even smelling many skeins, balls, and hanks a decision was finally reached! 5 skeins Valley Yarns Stockbridge in Dark Green! 50% superfine alpaca and 50% wool - very soft. In addition I got each of us a WPI Tool Kit and Ann Budd's Handy Yarn Requirement cheat sheet (actually it's a leaflet).

So what did I get for myself? A shameful lack of yarn, but it's so hard to decide and though I was there for over an hour, it twasn't long enough and my budget was small and without a number of specific projects and and and. Yeah I know, at least I was able to be in the actual mecca of yarn.

Inox size 6, 16 inch, circulars. I think I have a pair of these in bamboo by Crystal Palace, in fact I'm sure I do. Shoot. But I wanted to try Inox.
Valley Fibers size 4, 18 inch, circular. Just to try another brand and I don't have that size.
Valley Fibers size 5 DPNs bamboo, that now I can't find anywhere. Double shoot.

2 balls of Classic Elite Bazic superwash wool in colour 2932, boysenberry. I am thinking about making Odessa, without beads with this.
1 ball of Classic Elite Bazic superwash wool in colour 2904, beautiful blue with a touch of teal to it, though apparently they call it "navy"
1 ball of Adrienne Vittadini Fiora in colour 33 for only $2!!!
The above two blues might make another nice hat with the Fiora as the "brim" to show of the sequins.
1 skein of Trekking XXL #76, which was only $11.16 because it's a discontinued colour, which is a shame because it is beautiful! I really think I would wear socks made with these colours, or almost anything. Here it is as an actual sock using the yarn and colour.

For Inspiration:
Interweave Spring 2005 Tempting ideas: A Good Bias, Cable-Eight top, Bi-Color Brioche (omg what a knitter!) and Heads Up Hats.

Interweave Summer 2006 Tempting ideas: Looking Glass Top, Bias Corset (of course this photo give further evidence that this is not meant for women who have curves, though TGF begs to differ), Brioche Bodice, and Eyelet Chemise (who's eyelet patterning I just used on Adrienne's hat, not that you can really see it on that yarn, but just stockinette was gonna bore me). This guy thinks it's Worst of the Worst. He likes the Lotus tank, which I do as well. I just think it would look even worse on me than the Chemise.

Vogue Knitting International Spring/Summer 2005 More tempting ideas: Lace Tunic - though I would make it shorter (ie. not a tunic) and maybe delete the bottom patterning altogether and simply extend the top's design. Like I write that as if I know how to do that? Twinkle is a simple bolero type sweater that is a "very easy, very vogue" pattern which translates as something I can actually make. I think. The Lace Trim Bolero is cute as well. The Short Jacket in a better yarn choice could be nice to have around. I am not sure about the Short Sleeve Top, I can't tell if I like it. There are some nice scarves as well in this issue. The Ruffle Trim Top, I just don't know. I think it's too fussy for me.

But wait there's more! I also stopped in on Northampton Wools (the site's not up yet) as we were strolling around Noho (or 'Hamp to the true natives) on the last day, before beginning our TITATWTH. A really exciting note about that stop was finding their book, no not because it was a must have (though it is decent) but because I know one the models - Tanya Rapinchuk! She's a homebirth midwife that I did two births with back in the day. Being budget conscious, I looked in their basket of $3 specials and found:
1 ball of Rowan Calmer in 472
1 ball of Takhi Bunny in 016, otherwise known as black
1 ball of Jo Sharp Rare Comfort kid mohair in 615, aka Earl Grey.
Best of all? No tax on yarn in Massachusetts! Isn't that awesome news? Okay not to most of my readers, nor really of much import to me since I live in California but still. Imagine, no tax.
I found A Garden Stroll for $7 at Raven books, also. I think Jennie will like to look through this one.

I forgot to mention that before leaving town to travel east I visited Skein Lane once again and stocked up on more random Cascade 220.
1 skein of 7802 - a hot pink, they call it Cerise
1 skein of 7803 - a deeper shade, closer to fushia, they call it Magenta
1 skein of 9464 - a very bright royal purple.
3 skeins of 8509 - a soft light gray

Of course yesterday I could contain myself no longer since I was sent another letter from Skein Lane and I hadn't been in over 3 weeks, so off I went. Everything as of yesterday is 60% off and each day after another 5%. Okay, so everything is not a lot, or at least not a ton of what I want but I did find something to buy.

2 balls of GGH Raffinese - why? because it intrigued me. I have no idea what to do with it! Ah, here's an idea. Cannot find any decent and in english link. Methinks it's a discontinued product. It's 45% cotton, 35% polyethylene and 20% rayon. It's a light steel gray.

1 ball of Maggi Knits Maggi's Linen colour 17. Why? Because I am insane. I have no idea what to do with it, but it was cheap enough for an experiment of knitting with thick thread.

3 skeins of Dalegarn's Svale in lilac (5402) and 9 skeins in mist (5720). Again, for what I have no idea but it's SO soft and lovely. And at 60% off of $5.50 a skein, well a huge bargain to boot.

On the plane I mooned over my issue of Interweave Fall 2006 where I hate the colour of Bianca's Jacket but like the design features. I like the bodice part of Gatsby Girl but this the yoke and neckline would do me no favors. Swallowtail Shawl might be a nice size to tackle for my first lace project. Glaslow Lace is very pretty but shaping at the bottom a bit wide from my taste and my hips. I really like the simple sock pattern in this issue as well.

Okay, it's really time to finish that first mitten and make the second one.

* parody on the book The Web That Has No Weaver

I love when the universe agrees with me

Your Hidden Talent

Your natural talent is interpersonal relations and dealing with people. You communicate well and are able to bring disparate groups together. Your calming presence helps everything go more smoothly. People crave your praise and complements.

What's Your Hidden Talent?

Gilligan's Got Nothing on Me

To say that we had some travails in our travels may be a bit of an understatement.

After many nights of less than ideal sleep, I had even less on that Thursday evening, August 17^th, given the stress of getting ready which included packing which is quite the ordeal when one considers that along with 4 laptops (don’t ask), a tent, two sleeping bags, an air mattress and enough clothes to begin to satisfy my inner diva, there was finishing progress notes and a termination report for work, and deciding which school notes and books I would take with me. School work you ask? Yes, I know, but really I set my sights very realistically, but a very different reality presented itself so no school work got done. Where was I? Oh yes, leaving.

We had an early morning flight – 7:30 departure, out of Oakland. The night before I had made reservations with a taxi company (not to name names or anything but... Yellow Taxi Service 510.644.8181) to pick us up at Jennie’s house, where we were leaving one of our cars. After arriving in Alameda, there were numerous calls back and forth with them promising the cab was mere blocks away. Then, I got a call from an unknown number. It was a different taxi company saying that the one I called couldn’t make the pick up and this lady was promising me a car. Promises, schmises. Finally I called this other taxi cab company and said we can’t wait any longer, cancel the cab, we would drive ourselves to the airport. So much for arriving 1.5 hours before our flight to check our four bags.

The next steps went more smoothly except for not being able to reach our friend Adrienne, who had our itinerary, to which she had replied that she should be able to pick us up. In addition, a random border type person had left a car there that we would be able to use to bring ourselves from Western Massachusetts to Maine. Yeah, right. Nice try. Finally upon arriving at Bradley I reach her by phone. “Oh hi! Is that today? I’ve been at DAR State Forest where I don't get a cell phone signal. Mikey and the kids and our family are camping out. There’s no way I can get you. Oh, Keith’s car? He came by and picked it up out of the blue.” Sigh. A rental car is arranged for, which includes getting quoted an outrageous sum but also told if we use the courtesy phone and make reservations we could probably get a better price. Luckily this is true.

The upside of all this, up to this point, is we have a car to use and an empty house to crash in. Crash we do! We brainstorm all sorts of options about transport, and are quoted an enormous sum for a one way drop off with the car we already have through H*rtz. Monday we drive back down to Bradley, rent a different car from National (thanks to Mikey’s tip that they are much more reasonable about one-ways) and return the H*rtz car. Merrily we drive to Maine, confident that we can find someone to lend us a car to drive to Portland the next day (from Poland Spring) to return the car. A lovely newbie to camp, who renamed himself Fox during camp based on a dream where he asked for a spirit name (again, don't ask), lent us a car. While taking care of a million other things, I hop on the National’s website to find directions to their site. The directions seem odd, and conflict with Portland Airport directions. As in no relationship between the directions can be found, but I figure, the company’s own website would know the address. Right? Evidently not. After going around in circles and all around North Portland, I call them where a rude woman answers the phone. She doesn’t apologize for the website mistake but does tell me that it works just fine for her and then suggests that I pull into a gas station to ask for directions to the airport. She and the gas station guy say “You need to get on 295 South and get off at exit 5B.” Have you ever been on a highway, anywhere, where they don’t say it’s an airport exit? Me neither until now. It is not clear AT ALL. By instinct I go in the right direction but am wavering just a bit in confidence given how the morning has gone thus far, so into a packy store I go. Actually I send TGF since I am not sure I can contain myself from setting fire to something or breaking down in tears. At this point I’m really not sure which is more likely.

After a few more circles at the airport itself I find the right place to enter and a nice young woman with one of the little machines prints out a receipt. However there is bit of a problem. The quote for the one day, one-way rental was $92 and here is a receipt for $291! I can’t even see straight by this time. I barge into the counter area and I swear I have never in my entire life gone straight for the jugular on a service person. N-E-V-E-R. “Well you returned it late so there in an additional day charge”. Hello – I called you saying I was totally lost and had been driving around for over an hour trying to find the frigging airport because of your website’s directions! “Please don’t yell mam'm”. I still haven’t even truly raised my voice, but whatever. “Please don’t insult me that way”. I didn’t, I merely threatened to retract the payment on my card and write a letter (which I still need to do). “However I am a representative of the corporation and therefore you are attacking me.” What I wanted to say was “I’m sorry you have such a deficient self-esteem that you can’t separate yourself from the company.” In the end “the best I can do” totaled $100.

So at this point we have had to get our car out of daily parking at the airport (Thank you Ruth and Jennie for coordinating this for us), renting one car for about $200 and another for $100. All money we hadn’t budget for at all.

Fast forward almost two weeks, it’s time to leave camp and I put TGF in charge of finding a rental car to get us from Maine back to Massachusetts (and ultimately the airport). She is getting quote of around $240 and both of us are freaking out. I hop on the computer (computer internet access at camp is a whole other post – no really – that I may leave to TGF to write about) and find a deal for $170 through Alamo, which is also really National. Cue the foreboding music. Why didn’t we hitch a ride with some friends? Did I mention to one very large roller board suitcase that is more than half my height, the next one down being about half my height, an average carry-on roller board, the two duffle bags, and two stuffed backpacks? Another lovely camper drives TGF to the airport to pick up our 3rd rental car of the trip. Third, people!

We are so tired out that we decide to try to find a cheap motel for the night back in the Happy Valley. As much as we adore Adrienne and her family, they are loud and there is a near constant state of chaos there. There goes another $65. We had also hoped a quiet space would allow for some nookie time. But no, we were so exhausted that we fell asleep for about 10 hours!

Because we had no control over when TGF picked up the car we had a drop off time that was way early for our flight. So trying to be good doobies, TGF calls to find out how much they would ding us for dropping off the car 1.5 hours late. The attempts results in her being put on hold and then the call is dropped. She calls back and the woman is rude. “I have people here, you need to hold”. “Well I can tell you right now there will be a charge.” She then clicks TGF on hold without giving her a chance to say, “okay, yes I will hold”. I am furious. I call back, pretending to be TGF and immediately ask for her supervisor. I am put on hold for over 5 minutes, where she comes back on the line saying the supervisor is not available, could she help. “Well since you were just rude to me when I just called a moment ago, I’m not sure.” I explain the situation, albeit a bit tersely as I am at my limit with this crap. She states that it is $15 dollars an hour. “Wow! Kind of excessive, huh. That's some racket you guys have going there”. Yelling, actually yelling at me she says, “You don’t need to berate me. It’s half the day rate for each hour. Do you want the 2 hours or not!” I reply that yes change the drop off time and if by some miracle we show up at 2:30 I expect the additional charge to be removed. Sheesh.

Finally at the airport (after being charged the additional $30) we need to redistribute our belongings to avoid an additional charge for one piece of luggage being over 50lbs. As boarding time comes and goes, there is an announcement that there is a small mechanical issue they need to look into. The flight was supposed to leave at 5:30pm. At about 5:45pm they announce that the mechanic won't be at the gate until 6:30. Apparently they were flying the mechanic in from Cleveland. Did I mention we have a connecting flight? It becomes clear that we will miss our connection but I have hope that there will be one more flight out of Chicago to Oakland. The gods are still laughing.

The only flight they have that evening would deliver us to San Francisco at about 12:30am with no way to get to Alameda Luckily we head over to the gate and speak to a lovely gentleman who listened to our plight of needing to get home sooner rather than later. Obviously we didn’t mention that our refusal of a flight that would deliver us at Oakland at 12:20pm the next day was because of a date to meet Ruth and pick up our beloved Puppyman. After some key strokes, we had a voucher for a hotel (free shuttle to said hotel), and a 6 a.m. departure (it was now about 9:30pm) with a transfer in Denver, which would deliver us to Oakland about 10:10am. The Wyndam Hotel O'Hare afforded us the best bed we had slept on our entire time away. A plus, definitely. We arrive easily but our luggage did not. Paperwork filed, a taxi found, pick up our car at Jennie’s, a quick stop home to see the cats, and off to the Albany Bulb to see Ruth, Piccolo and Wyatt. Afterwards I ride with Ruth up to her home in Kentfield to pick up our other car.

A nap has been had. Pizza was just delivered. Next on the list, appease the Gods of Transportation and Travel.